womanhood

it sure ain't easy to be a woman some days.

i say this on the day of the month when i feel the full weight of each individual emotion, all parading by from moment to moment, changing about every third minute. some men may understand this, but I would take a gander that most men will never quite know this pain, the pain of a woman whose body is literally crying to have a child (but can't, for one reason or many), the pain of being the breadwinner, the pain of feeling the pain of everyone else in her life all on the same day, the pain of physical incapacitation that can happen each month (some months worse than others), the pain of feeling all of these things at once in an overwhelming minute.

it's hard some days to be a woman, but even on the worst days, I am thankful to be breathing, to have fully functioning limbs and mind, to be able to hypothesize and joke about the way i would choose to die, if the time was imminent, and to have the uninhabited ability to eat the weight of my sorrows in mini cupcakes, two bites at a time.